Mamma

Why this? I lost my Mom when I was 8 years old. She had cancer which was diagnosed at a very late stage. Chemotherapy, radiation everything was just too late. Within 6 months of being diagnosed I lost her. I never told her how much I love her when I had her, and I regret that every day of my life

I miss you Maa. We fought. I thought I hated you. I always said I loved Baba more. Why did I? I know you are always there with me, beside me, laughing with me, crying with me, wondering why I do what I do. I so wish I could talk to you. There's so much to tell. Why dint we speak when you were there? I knew what death was. Why dint I realize how precious you were? Drops of tears fall down my face which has no expression. When my friends fight with their moms, I so hate them for it. How can I let them know what they have without seeming piteous? I dont want their pity. I want you. I could hug you till my arms fall off. I miss us so much. Won't you scold me? Won't you tell me to do better? They say life goes on. It doesn't. It stopped for me when it stopped for you. They say things happen for the good, there's always a way out. Why do they lie? Why wont you come back to me? What can I do to set things right? I love you Mamma. You always are for me, always will be. I can't think of you in the past. I can't.